Who's next?
We've been crunching the numbers...
Some people say this a waste of talent, and a waste of computing resources. Maybe.
Others have said this proves we lack class, or even basic decency. Very possible.
Regardless, our research shows almost everybody just wants to know one thing:
Which notable people are most likely to die next??
How could anyone answer this question? Impossible isn't it? Only baby jesus could know such things right???
Prepare to have your mind blown. Introducing:
The Deathpulse Reaper-Quant Team ™
Brilliant. Dark. Human-computer machines.
We write algorithms only the darkest and most depraved computers can interpret, and execute.
Nerds. We barely pay them anything, but they live for this death stuff. So what's the harm? We all get to "reap" (hahaha) the benefits!
The Deathpulse.com Next-2-Die™ predictions are:
Drum roll, please...
Justin Timberlake
American singer, songwriter, record producer, and actor (born 1981).
Born January 31st, 1981 in Memphis. [ref]
Going-2-Die™ November 17th, 2025 at 44 years old
Jung Chanwoo
South korean singer and actor.
Born January 26th, 1998 in Yongin.
Going-2-Die™ November 16th, 2025 at 27 years old
Günther Schwägermann
Ss officer.
Born July 24th, 1915 in Uelzen.
Going-2-Die™ November 14th, 2025 at 110 years old
Irwin I. Shapiro
American astrophysicist.
Born October 10th, 1929 in New York City.
Going-2-Die™ November 17th, 2025 at 96 years old
Benito Carvajales
Cuban footballer.
Born July 25th, 1913 in Havana.
Going-2-Die™ November 15th, 2025 at 112 years old
Spooky right?? Well...if any of these predictions come true it would be.
C'mon, you'd be impressed. You'd tell a friend. Maybe click on an advertisement or two?
And if they don't come true?
Suppose that's good news, cause these fine people will live to reap (hahaha) another day!
Prediction run #1763126606
Algorithm v0.2
Quant employee ID 348
We'll keep improving our predictions, but you can share these exact results using:
https://www.deathpulse.com/next?key=eyJydW4iOjE3NjMxMjY2MDYsImlkcyI6WzQyMjA0NSw0MTgyMyw0MjAwMTYs%0ANjM0NDc1LDE0ODY0N119%0A
Ya'll come on back any time for more Deathpulse.com Next-2-Die™ predictions!
Good men must die, but death cannot kill their names. Unknown