Who's next?
We've been crunching the numbers...
Some people say this a waste of talent, and a waste of computing resources. Maybe.
Others have said this proves we lack class, or even basic decency. Very possible.
Regardless, our research shows almost everybody just wants to know one thing:
Which notable people are most likely to die next??
How could anyone answer this question? Impossible isn't it? Only baby jesus could know such things right???
Prepare to have your mind blown. Introducing:
The Deathpulse Reaper-Quant Team ™
Brilliant. Dark. Human-computer machines.
We write algorithms only the darkest and most depraved computers can interpret, and execute.
Nerds. We barely pay them anything, but they live for this death stuff. So what's the harm? We all get to "reap" (hahaha) the benefits!
The Deathpulse.com Next-2-Die™ predictions are:
Drum roll, please...
Blake Lively
American actress.
Born August 25th, 1987 in Tarzana.
Going-2-Die™ June 26th, 2026 at 38 years old
James Hong
American actor (born 1929).
Born February 22nd, 1929 in Minneapolis.
Going-2-Die™ June 25th, 2026 at 97 years old
Farida Khanum
Pakistani classical singer.
Born January 6th, 1929 in Kolkata.
Going-2-Die™ June 24th, 2026 at 97 years old
Giovanni Guidetti
Italian volleyball coach.
Born September 20th, 1972 in Modena. [ref]
Going-2-Die™ June 28th, 2026 at 53 years old
Oliver Penrose
British physicist, mathematician.
Born June 6th, 1929 in Colchester.
Going-2-Die™ June 27th, 2026 at 97 years old
Spooky right?? Well...if any of these predictions come true it would be.
C'mon, you'd be impressed. You'd tell a friend. Maybe click on an advertisement or two?
And if they don't come true?
Suppose that's good news, cause these fine people will live to reap (hahaha) another day!
Prediction run #1782273374
Algorithm v0.2
Quant employee ID 348
We'll keep improving our predictions, but you can share these exact results using:
https://www.deathpulse.com/next?key=eyJydW4iOjE3ODIyNzMzNzQsImlkcyI6WzUyMjQ1LDY4NzM4OCw3MTUyOCw1%0AMjg5MjgsMTQ1OTQ2XX0%3D%0A
https://www.deathpulse.com/next?key=eyJydW4iOjE3ODIyNzMzNzQsImlkcyI6WzUyMjQ1LDY4NzM4OCw3MTUyOCw1%0AMjg5MjgsMTQ1OTQ2XX0%3D%0A
Ya'll come on back any time for more Deathpulse.com Next-2-Die™ predictions!
It is the secret of the world that all things subsist and do not die, but retire a little from sight and afterwards return again. Ralph Waldo Emerson