Who's next?
We've been crunching the numbers...
Some people say this a waste of talent, and a waste of computing resources. Maybe.
Others have said this proves we lack class, or even basic decency. Very possible.
Regardless, our research shows almost everybody just wants to know one thing:
Which notable people are most likely to die next??
How could anyone answer this question? Impossible isn't it? Only baby jesus could know such things right???
Prepare to have your mind blown. Introducing:
The Deathpulse Reaper-Quant Team ™
Brilliant. Dark. Human-computer machines.
We write algorithms only the darkest and most depraved computers can interpret, and execute.
Nerds. We barely pay them anything, but they live for this death stuff. So what's the harm? We all get to "reap" (hahaha) the benefits!
The Deathpulse.com Next-2-Die™ predictions are:
Drum roll, please...
Alexandra Daddario
American actress (born 1986).
Born March 16th, 1986 in New York City.
Going-2-Die™ July 11th, 2026 at 40 years old
Rosemary Harris
British actress.
Born September 19th, 1927 in Ashby.
Going-2-Die™ July 11th, 2026 at 98 years old
Tim "Ripper" Owens
American heavy metal singer.
Born September 13th, 1967 in Akron.
Going-2-Die™ July 7th, 2026 at 58 years old
Michael Howard
Fencer.
Born December 24th, 1928 in London Borough of Richmond upon Thames.
Going-2-Die™ July 7th, 2026 at 97 years old
Hiroko Takenishi
Japanese writer.
Born April 11th, 1929 in Hiroshima.
Going-2-Die™ July 7th, 2026 at 97 years old
Spooky right?? Well...if any of these predictions come true it would be.
C'mon, you'd be impressed. You'd tell a friend. Maybe click on an advertisement or two?
And if they don't come true?
Suppose that's good news, cause these fine people will live to reap (hahaha) another day!
Prediction run #1783425709
Algorithm v0.2
Quant employee ID 348
We'll keep improving our predictions, but you can share these exact results using:
https://www.deathpulse.com/next?key=eyJydW4iOjE3ODM0MjU3MDksImlkcyI6WzQyMDI0NywyMDI2NTEsMzQ3MjIs%0AMTEyMDU2LDEzNzY1NV19%0A
https://www.deathpulse.com/next?key=eyJydW4iOjE3ODM0MjU3MDksImlkcyI6WzQyMDI0NywyMDI2NTEsMzQ3MjIs%0AMTEyMDU2LDEzNzY1NV19%0A
Ya'll come on back any time for more Deathpulse.com Next-2-Die™ predictions!
Live your life, do your work, then take your hat. Henry David Thoreau