Who's next?
We've been crunching the numbers...
Some people say this a waste of talent, and a waste of computing resources. Maybe.
Others have said this proves we lack class, or even basic decency. Very possible.
Regardless, our research shows almost everybody just wants to know one thing:
Which notable people are most likely to die next??
How could anyone answer this question? Impossible isn't it? Only baby jesus could know such things right???
Prepare to have your mind blown. Introducing:
The Deathpulse Reaper-Quant Team ™
Brilliant. Dark. Human-computer machines.
We write algorithms only the darkest and most depraved computers can interpret, and execute.
Nerds. We barely pay them anything, but they live for this death stuff. So what's the harm? We all get to "reap" (hahaha) the benefits!
The Deathpulse.com Next-2-Die™ predictions are:
Drum roll, please...
Tim Curry
British actor.
Born April 19th, 1946 in Grappenhall. [ref]
Going-2-Die™ June 2nd, 2026 at 80 years old
Milan Panić
Yugoslav politician.
Born December 20th, 1929 in Belgrade.
Going-2-Die™ June 4th, 2026 at 96 years old
Mihajlo D. Mesarovic
Serbian academic.
Born July 2nd, 1928 in Zrenjanin.
Going-2-Die™ June 2nd, 2026 at 97 years old
Gerhard Rühm
Austrian composer.
Born February 12th, 1930 in Vienna. [ref]
Going-2-Die™ June 4th, 2026 at 96 years old
Valérie Nicolas
French handball player.
Born March 12th, 1975 in Lampaul-Guimiliau.
Going-2-Die™ June 1st, 2026 at 51 years old
Spooky right?? Well...if any of these predictions come true it would be.
C'mon, you'd be impressed. You'd tell a friend. Maybe click on an advertisement or two?
And if they don't come true?
Suppose that's good news, cause these fine people will live to reap (hahaha) another day!
Prediction run #1780242097
Algorithm v0.2
Quant employee ID 348
We'll keep improving our predictions, but you can share these exact results using:
https://www.deathpulse.com/next?key=eyJydW4iOjE3ODAyNDIwOTcsImlkcyI6Wzc0NTc2NSw0Mzk3MzUsMjYyNTYy%0ALDUzNjg2OSw5OTQzNV19%0A
Ya'll come on back any time for more Deathpulse.com Next-2-Die™ predictions!
If you’re not ready to die for it, take the word “freedom” out of your vocabulary. Malcolm X