Welcome! Check out today's deaths, recent deaths, or our deaths stats.
Feeling experimental? Head on over to our newest (and darkest) feature: Next-2-Die™ predictions
Who's next?
We've been crunching the numbers...
Some people say this a waste of talent, and a waste of computing resources. Maybe.
Others have said this proves we lack class, or even basic decency. Very possible.
Regardless, our research shows almost everybody just wants to know one thing:
Which notable people are most likely to die next??
How could anyone answer this question? Impossible isn't it? Only baby jesus could know such things right???
Prepare to have your mind blown. Introducing:
The Deathpulse Reaper-Quant Team ™
Brilliant. Dark. Human-computer machines.
We write algorithms only the darkest and most depraved computers can interpret, and execute.
Nerds. We barely pay them anything, but they live for this death stuff. So what's the harm? We all get to "reap" (hahaha) the benefits!
The Deathpulse.com Next-2-Die™ predictions are:
Drum roll, please...
Johnny Depp
American actor, producer, and musician (born 1963).
Born June 9th, 1963 in Owensboro. [ref]
Going-2-Die™ April 30th, 2024 at 60 years old
Dennis Seidenberg
German ice hockey player.
Born July 18th, 1981 in Villingen-Schwenningen.
Going-2-Die™ April 26th, 2024 at 42 years old
Lizardo Rodríguez Nue
Peruvian footballer.
Born August 30th, 1910 in Peru.
Going-2-Die™ April 29th, 2024 at 113 years old
Spooky right?? Well...if any of these predictions come true it would be.
C'mon, you'd be impressed. You'd tell a friend. Maybe click on an advertisement or two?
And if they don't come true?
Suppose that's good news, cause these fine people will live to reap (hahaha) another day!
Prediction run #1664990764
Algorithm v0.2
Quant employee ID 348
We'll keep improving our predictions, but you can share these exact results using:
https://www.deathpulse.com/next?key=eyJydW4iOjE2NjQ5OTA3NjQsImlkcyI6WzQzMzE1NCw0MTY2NTksNDMwNzI1%0ALDU2MDQ1MSwxMTA0NTRdfQ%3D%3D%0A
Ya'll come on back any time for more Deathpulse.com Next-2-Die™ predictions!
Those men who, in war, seek to preserve their lives at any rate commonly die with shame and ignominy, while those who look upon death as common to all, and unavoidable, and are only solicitous to die with honour, oftener arrive at old age and, while they live, live happier. Xenophon